GLASGOW As told by Shona

My sixty minute tour of Glasgow

After arriving at the Central Station I was to have my first sighting of Glasgow but not before the canny Scots had managed to prise off me my hard earned change in the form of the 20p coin. Bloody well cheeky I thought charging me to have a pee.

I had exactly one hour to spare before I caught my next train to my final destination in Aberdeen. On leaving the station I was quite shocked to see so many people scurrying about minding their own business as it was typical Scottish weather it was raining so hard it was quite literally bouncing off the ground.

Of course when I told friends and family of my future trip they all but one offered me an umbrella but as my time is very limited here I feel that I have to make haste and see as much as possible in this huge city (5th biggest populus in the UK).

I knew that in 1988 Glasgow enjoyed its status of after winning Glasgow Garden Festival title and this lead the way to winning the title of European City of Culture and although Glasgow has quite a tarnished repuation it is now considered by Lonely Planet to be one of the world's top ten tourist cities.

So I decided as time was not on my side I would head towards the River Clyde and see if I could spot any well know ships there. Glasgow used to pave the way in shipbuiding. A famour shipbuiding landmark on the Clyde is the Finnieston Crane at Yokhill. Completed in 1931, it was originally used to load large steam ocomatives for exportation. This impressive machine is still in working order according to my guide book and I could see this monstrosity from where I was standing.

This was a factual based fiction travel experience as written and edited by Sam Stilton.


INVERNESS AND THE BLACK ISLE.
A mancunian´s opinion on Scotland.
It wasn´t so long ago, that I found myself standing on a cold miserable night in Manchester England, speaking with a local, that he told me about his fond memories of Scotland, many years ago as a contractor for the gas board, he and his crew were sent up to Scotland from down south, to do some work on the pipes and supplies.

Cold place Scotland son, he said to me, it is I agreed, where in Scotland you from, I was born in Inverness, Raigmore, -- his face lit up, I know it well, then you´ll know the black isle, he went on to explain, for sure I did I agreed, having spent many a summer holiday at my aunts in Tain, I wasn´t unfamiliar to the black isle, we´d cross the bridge from Inverness to the blackisle, to take a short cut on the Journey, when I was a much younger lad, the journey took way longer, that was before the Keswick bridge that this Mancunian was referring to.

His take on life stood on the doorway of this pub in Manchester, whilst inhaling on a cigarette, that it was good times when he had a Scotland job, at first it was like what the **** Scotland, - you´re not sending us way up their, get to **** he apparantly had muttered to his boss.

So he and the lads got their gear, said goodbye to their missuses and loved ones, took themselves up to Scotland, and its here where we find how times indeed have changed, they checked themselves into a hotel near Raigmore, and each day they stayed they got an allowance, it basically paid their room and a little extra for discomfort for being away from home, nothing special, but it was better than a kick in the chops if I knew what I meant like.

Well after doing this for a few weeks, the contract just didn´t look like it was ganna end, lad.. So we has a look at our pay, and has a look at how the gasboard was paying us, and like it wasnt rocket science, one plus one heck it made two, it didnt matter where we stayed we´d get paid the allowances anyway, so that was it we were off like a shot, we had a quick trawl around some papers, and found oursells a hoose. So next thing we know we´re like paying for this hoose, which we found in the black isle, other side of that bridge (The Keswick Bridge) and getting more money in than we was getting pay.. It was brilliant.

Now we didna even have to touch our pay, we didnt have to bother about food bills or cookin because there was enough in the pot to eat out every night, have a few beers, phone home, and not even touch the wages.  You know we must have been their about 1 year, it was and I was in middle of Inverness, and that was the first place I saw someone in a kilt. I was walking along the banks of the Ness in Inverness, and I goes accross one of those wooden decked pedestrian bridges to the other side, about half way accross and there was this man in a kilt, I remember that, it stuck out because of course I´d seen Jocks in kilts before - you know what I mean, hanging around outside a church after a wedding or a reception, maybe in a band or a sports event, but this chap wasnt any of that he was just wandering around doing his own thing, shopping, whatever but in a kilt, dont get me wrong he wasnt a young guy must have been in his 60´s but it stands out to this day, aye lad, happy times.
Good place Scotland, the other thing I remember was going to the Caledonian Thistle football ground and watching the odd friendly from time to time, I´d go back any day. Visited a place called Nairn, that was a cold windy dreary town, stayed in a caravan near the beach, and went a wee bit further along to Elgin, it was nice in Elgin, I remember it well -- happy days.   He then decided it was a tad too cold to stand out here gibbering, his missus was about to sing in the Karaoke, lol..

As told to Daniel Porter, in Manchester Feb 31 2013.